Trying

I am trying so hard just to save. I have no money and It seams like I buy something that i dont need and it PISSES ME OFF!

I want someone to hold on to money for me but I dont want them to give it to me unless i am getting a computer or the I phone. 

When I get a paycheck it semas like i have if for a bout a second then WHAM it is gone! FML I am so sick of this feeling like i have nothing. 

When my next paycheck comes i want to put like $30 in a box and keep doing that every check but I have to pay my dad and i have to pay Andrea back. 

FML

Everyone is BEAUTIFUL!

Thining about school makes me so streesed. On one hand i am so exceited about going to GRCC but on the other i am leaveing something that is so farmiliar to me and that is scary. I am going to miss Andrea so much I mean i will see her but not like i have the past 2 years. I will miss cleaning up after her and I will miss us fighting over dumb things like not filling the toilet paper holder. I will also miss Muskegon. sure there is not a lot to do and I want to be home all the time but not gong there is going to be the worst part i think. And with me and Andrea I think that we are going to grow apart even though i know both of us dont want that but how could it not. Living with some one changes everything. and for the past two years i have learned so much about her. I never thought that i could have such a BEST FRIEND!!!! some one that knows everything like where my stickys are for posters.  I could not begin to tell you how much i would kill for you to live with me. :) 

I want to break through

I am changing again and i dont know how i feel about it. On one hand i am supper excited about it and on the other i am not. I feel like ppl are thing i am just doing this because you are. but im not!

at home 24/7 i am excited and its going to be great. and the feeling of saving money feels great. This summer I am going to work my ass off. I am excited about making money. 

Next fall is going to be exciting and different. life change that will get me to a good place is going to be great. something that makes me smile everything i think about it (besided Jeff Hardy) something that is going to make me feel better about myself and make me feel like i am going somewhere.